Instituting Change and Loving Life

As many of you noticed, I have not been posting for the last several months. I will explain why, but first I wanted to say that I appreciate those of you who have come back. I hope you enjoy the new content that I will be posting in the near future.

Around February or March of last year I did what I do every year at the same time. I checked out. Yep that’s right, I stopped caring about literally everything. This happens every year. Mentally, emotionally, physically gone. Most people would probably not even realize it when they look at me. I still feed my kids, take them to their activities but deep down I don’t feel anything. Can I explain it? No, but finally reaching a point in my life where I can recognize that it happens has allowed me to start taking steps to try to change some things in my life. And those changes will hopefully make those months easier for me when they come around again.


The First Change:

I started a program on October first called #last90days by Rachel Hollis. The basic premise is to not give up now and wait to start new goals in the new year. We have 90 days left THIS year to make changes. In the program they set out five things for you to do EVERY day. Please go to her website or search on Instagram for #last90days to get more information. She explains it way better than I ever could.

The “Five to Thrive” have really changed not only my behavior but my mindset as well. I get up each morning and make a plan for the day. How will I be able to get all of my water in, will I be able to exercise at my normal time or do I need to plan for it later in the day, will I be somewhere that might tempt me to have soda?  These are all questions that I ask myself BEFORE I get into the actual situations so that I am in control when they come up throughout my day. My hope is that by doing this program for 90 days, I will develop these positive habits, and I will continue with them well into the new year and the months that I tend to struggle emotionally.


The Second Change:

The second change I made started with one of the five to thrive but led me to a deeper place. The last thing to do each day is write down 10 things you are grateful for. 10 things every day???? How is that even possible? I was sure I would have trouble with this, and I did at first. Being focused on the negative in my life has always been my “normal.” I wasn’t taking the time to see the little amazing things that happen to me every day. When I started writing them down, I was amazed with how happy it made me. I even started noticing the negative things a little less.

Write 10 things you are grateful for each day! And gratitude will change your heart!

The Last Change:

I started writing again. Yes this blog! Writing makes me incredibly happy. Putting my thoughts and feelings into words makes me feel like I have accomplished something. Even if only one person reads a post and comments that they understand where I am coming from, I feel like I have made a difference. And that feeling is pure euphoria!

My New Blog Focus:

Checking out emotionally was not the only reason quit blogging. I was not happy with where I was forcing my blog to go. I was trying to make into something that it wasn’t! Trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. I can hear you all asking, “What do you mean?” All of the hype about making hundreds of thousands of dollars just by blogging had sucked me in. What!! I want to make money doing what makes me happy, so I tried to force my blog to become something that it wasn’t. Poorly placed Amazon affiliate links were jammed into posts where they shouldn’t be. My journey as a parent, a wife and a woman has always been my main focus, but I found myself trying to blog about organizing and decorating because it was easy to add links to those posts. I just forgot one simple fact. . . I am a horrible decorator and lack most home organization skills.  

So I am back! You can expect new posts about my everyday life sprinkled with sarcasm and sass! I have thrown the Amazon links out the window and accepted that the joy I get from writing is reward enough. Feel free to comment on any posts that touch your life. I love feedback and honest discussion. Have a grateful day!

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How to Bring Balance to Your Life?

Here is where I get real. I feel like I am drowning. Not just drowning but failing at everything I try. I know we all feel this way at times. Like you have so much you are trying to get done and only doing all of them halfway. Or if you try supper hard at one thing then all of the others start to fall apart. Why is it so hard to find balance in our lives?

My friends have told me that I am trying to do too much, but what do you stop doing completely in order to focus on something else? The kids, the house, the blog (which I am hoping to to make a successful stream of income), the husband, myself? What do I drop? Nothing, so I keep giving everything half of what it deserves and feeling like a failure at everything.

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Resolutions or Goals: Which is better?

With the start of the New Year, we all tend to look at our lives and think about what we would like to change or make better in the year ahead. We all make resolutions whether you write them down or just think of them in your head. Some people say they don’t make resolutions, they make goals. To that I say yes all resolutions are goals but not all goals are resolutions. Resolutions are goals you make at the start of a new year.

 Resolutions or Goals: Which is better?

Some people don’t like to call them resolutions because they have heard that most resolutions are never fulfilled. Well to that I say that it depends on you. If you make the resolution, it speaks to you and you make steps on how to achieve it, then I think you have a great chance of reaching your resolution. It is when we don’t actively try to complete the resolution that we fail.

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Jeans Shopping . . . The Worst Errand Ever!

The turn in the weather made jeans shopping a necessity this week. . . the worst thing ever, well maybe second only to swimsuit shopping.

Jean Sale

I walked into Kohls armed with $60 in Kohls cash, a 20% off coupon and the will to find some jeans. My adventure began with scouring about 20 tables full of folded jeans, searching for my size (I will spare you the actual size). Of course, I have to dig through each and every pile in search of the right size because there seems to be no easy way to organize jeans in a store.

The Joy of Having Long Legs

My first difficulty lies in that I am just slightly too tall to wear regular length jeans. The hilarious part of it all is that sometimes the longs are way too long, leaving me in this weird limbo world where nothing seems to fit. So once I locate my size, I have to search for a “long” which is ridiculously hard to find. They have “shorts” in every style and brand but “longs” are rare. Adding to the length problem, I am now currently in between sizes. The bigger size is comfy, but I find myself always pulling up my jeans. On the other hand, the smaller size makes me feel like a sausage, and I can’t sit comfortably. So which way to go?

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The Mom Mantra: Pick Your Battles

One parenting mantra I have lived by for the last 20 years has been “pick your battles!” So she doesn’t want to wear pants today even though it is freezing outside. Okay wear the dress. So he doesn’t want to eat the veggies. Okay so just eat the chicken nuggets. Then later when I have to make someone take icky medicine, I can and will win that battle because I have to.

The Battle of the Orange Toothbrush

But when do they start to realize that “pick your battles” works both ways????? Yesterday we had to go to a follow up dentist appointment for her “sleep dentistry” that she had two weeks ago. They had removed 7 teeth and filled 3 cavities (yes, I know we need to do better with her tooth care). The dentist used an orange toothbrush to show her how to brush effectively. The only problem was that the orange toothbrush was too big for her mouth, but they used it because she likes orange. The toothbrush came home with us. I am sure you can see where this is going.

The Orange Toothbrush

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Bruno Mars, Wine and Social Anxiety

I had a truly amazing night yesterday! I saw Bruno Mars in concert! First concert I have been to in 20 years.

Bruno Mars on Stage

The Invite:

So a little back story to get us to the amazing night. . . I got a text from my friend inviting me to go to the Bruno Mars concert in a limo with her and 4 of her other friends to celebrate her 50th birthday. Immediately red flags went up in my introverted socially anxious mind. She said four friends and I heard four strangers, in a small space for hours. But I shut down the voices and checked my calendar. I was free that night and nothing scheduled for the next day either. No excuse to say no, so I immediately texted her back that I would love to go. If I had waited even one day to respond, I would have talked myself out of going. Social situations have never been something I willing jump into.

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Mom Tribes: When You are on the Outside Looking In

Mom Tribes are great. . . as long as you are in one. But for the introverted, lonely moms out there, Mom Tribes make our loneliness even greater. When we see the other moms having fun and talking and laughing, we shrink a little smaller. We build up the walls that we think protect us but what those walls are really doing is making us unapproachable.

Mom Tribe drinking wine

Even back in high school I was a loner. I had one or two close friends and a bunch of acquaintances. I was never invited to hang out, not because no one liked me but because no one ever thought about me. It almost felt like I was invisible.

Fast forward 20 years and I feel like I am back in high school. Invisible again. 

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